Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
