i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
He kissed a someone with a penis
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
