We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
