Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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