Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
