no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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