plz talk dirty to me
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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