I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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