I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
