That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
she peed on how many people?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
