I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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