wake up i wanna do it froggy style
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
whose parrot is this?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Randomize