so that wasnt chicken after all
My brain says no but my pants say off.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Randomize
