i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
