My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
