I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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