You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Someone signed my nipple.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize