After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
