he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I have surprise drugs for everyone
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
