The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
we're making bets on your personal life
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
