i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
