Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I just found puke in my bra..
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm way too hungover for life right now
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
