Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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