Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
