I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
