Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
