i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
