Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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