4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
this is an emotional support booty call
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
