What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize