butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize