That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
now i know why i became what i already was.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
