Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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