Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize