Do you still have your period?
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
