I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
