i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
