i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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