Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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