I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
