why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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