I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
