I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
are you so shy because you have an std?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize