have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
