I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize