grandma shit on top of the toilet
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize