Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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