Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
