Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
