Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
