my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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