Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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